From Me, With Love

Every Sunday new secrets are posted, and every Sunday I read them. I wonder what it feels like to see your secret there, posted for the whole world to see.

Hundreds of times I’ve thought about sending in a secret, but doubt always follows. What if my secret wasn’t posted? Would I get my feelings hurt that mine wasn’t good enough, or would I feel better just knowing that I could safely share it? Are there consequences? What if someone recognizes something about my secret and links it back to me? 

Then again, it’s possible that the opposite of all those thoughts could happen. Then it would be great, right?  

Why would anyone be scared of anonymously sending in a secret? I guess being scared of the consequences is the reason it was a secret in the first place.

Right now Monster J is on 5 different medicines for his sickness: antibiotic, decongestant, liquid vitamins for anemia (ick!), some nose spray crap and ibuprofen for fever. I feel so bad for him, but he’s taking it all like a champ. He takes the decongestant 4 times per day and it causes dizziness and drowsiness, so he’s been walking around like a drunk zombie since Wednesday. Now I guess the decongestant is kicking in because all that crap that’s in his chest is breaking up and he’s coughing some kind of awful and wheezing. He wasn’t doing any of that before he started on this medicine.

Ugh, I hate it when my baby’s sick! I feel so helpless. 

Tonight I was sitting in the chair in Monster J’s room with him, waiting for him to fall asleep.

*flip*

*flop*

*grunt*

What is wrong with you, kid? Why aren’t you going to sleep!?!

*flip*

*grunt*

*flop*

*grunt*

Then I realized… he doesn’t want me to put him to sleep anymore. That’s why the incessant flipping, flopping and grunting. That’s why for the past couple of months I have just given up and put him in his crib without him being nearly asleep.

My sweet, little baby boy is growing up. *tears* He can put himself to sleep now. He can feed himself now. He doesn’t say “bup” instead of “up” anymore.

Oh. My. God. What happened? Weren’t you just staring around aimlessly and eating your hands all day last week? When did you become this… person? How do you weigh over 30 pounds and are almost 3 feet tall!?! Aren’t you like 2 months old or something?

I know that every parent comes to this revelation at some point – that they no longer have a baby, but a toddler, a monster. But isn’t it supposed to happen when their kids are like 5 or older? Not under 2! Right?

Oh, this sucks.

*Yikes* I almost forgot about posting today. I am so tired and yet I haven’t even been doing anything. The entire week I’ve done nothing except hang out at the house with Monster J and I’m still worn out. I thought if I just sat on my lazy ass all the time, I wouldn’t be – I was wrong.

Monster J is feeling better today. More active and noisy -YAY! (in sarcastic tone)- and no fever. One of the prescriptions he’s taking causes drowsiness and dizziness, though, so I’ve had a drunk-like, sleepy monster on my hands all day. It’s pretty entertaining.

Something is off – I dunno what it is yet – but I’m not normal right now. The main reason I know something is wrong is I haven’t even wanted to go shopping. Scary. I can’t think of anything to write about to save my life, I don’t want to do anything or go anywhere, and I’m pretty sure I could sleep until around Thanksgiving. *Sigh*

Monster J is sick… again. Thankfully this time it’s not pneumonia – just a “throat infection” (real technical doctor term for you) whatever the hell that could be. He is also anemic… again. Awesome. NOT! Jeesh can’t this poor kid get a break? If it’s not poop problems, it’s pneumonia. If it’s not pneumonia, it’s poop problems. If it’s not either of those, it’s a throat infection. What gives?

I have to take him back to the doctor in 3 days if he’s not better by then. Wish him (and my sanity) luck. *crosses all crossable parts*

What is going on with me? I’m so freakin’ tired I can’t see straight, and this has been for the last at least 3 nights in a row. Which, by the way, I have gotten at least 8 hours of sleep for each of those nights. I don’t get it…? I can’t even carry on a normal conversation past 6:00pm anymore – I get all scatterbrained, lose my train of thought and can’t finish a sentence. Something’s gotta give.

So anywho – this whole “write something about myself everyday” thing is turning out to be harder than I thought. I can’t think of something about myself everyday that isn’t too stupid or embarassing to share. I mean, really y’all are lucky (or unfortunate – whichever way you choose to look at it, I guess) that you even got to hear about my eating “quirkiness” as I like to call it.

The last couple of days have been really chill for me. I haven’t done anything whatsoever. Monster J and I have been hanging out at the house, doing absolutely nothing at all. This is most likely because I’m SO DAMN TIRED!!! Blah.

Unfortunately, this is also means I haven’t done anymore Christmas shopping. It’s only November and I’m already behind on Christmas shopping. That shouldn’t be possible, but it is.

I’m off to bed. I can hardly keep my eyes open, and if I keep writing pretty soon I’ll sound like a giant idiot. Well more so than I already do, anyway. =P

I was so tired last night that I couldn’t even remember what I wrote when I woke up this morning. Sad, but true. I didn’t even cook dinner last night (we ordered pizza and watched the Cowboys game – WOOHOO GO COWBOYS!) which is a rarity for Sundays.

As for the Halloween pics, Saturday when I came to work I had my USB cable but no camera. Now today I have the camera but no USB cable. Maybe someday soon I’ll get my shizz together and post them. Sorry – it will be soon – I swear**! **Disclaimer – by soon I mean sometime before the end of the year, not as in the next day or anything. =)

I couldn’t remember what me-fact I was planning on writing yesterday, but I did come up with a new one today. Daddy got us KFC for lunch and while we were putting our food on plates, I started thinking about how weird I am with food, among many, many, many other things.

As I mentioned before, I am extremely picky when it comes to food and such things. I was talking to my mom a few weeks ago about this and asked when it all came about. She said I hadn’t always been so strange with food, but she couldn’t remember when it started.

I WILL NOT eat anything that touches another food unless the two things are meant to touch. Say I have a biscuit, chicken and mashed potatoes. If the potatoes and biscuit touch, I will only eat the the parts of said food that haven’t been touched by other said food. Weird, I know – I warned you. I mostly eat with my hands. I am fully aware this is considered rude, but I just can’t help it. I blame it on my mom, she does that too. I refuse to eat in the dark, with the exception of the movies. I want to make sure no bugs flew into my food when I wasn’t paying attention or couldn’t see. I am a veeeeerrrryyy slow eater. Anyone in my family can attest to this.

The list is long, but you get the general idea. Sometimes my weirdness annoys those close to me, but for the most part everyone has just learned to make fun of me for it live with it. I’ve been told it’s quite entertaining, really.

I’m so freakin’ tired. Monster J and I went shopping with Nana today to get a few things to finish decorating her living room (which looks fantabulous by the way). We had lots of fun, but it was a long day, and I’m exhausted.

I had something in mind to write about, but I can’t remember what it is being as how I’m falling asleep writing this.

zzzzzZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZ…

… TiVo! I LOOOOOOVE TiVo. It drives me absolutely bonkers if I have to watch something on TV that isn’t pre-recorded. I hate having to sit through all the stupid commercials and not being able to pause if I have to pee, or not being able to rewind if I didn’t hear something. If there is a show I want to watch and it’s not on my TiVo, I will record the show, watch something else in the meantime, then go back and watch the original show after it’s been recorded. Pathetic, I know.

Grease monkey must be the only person in the entjre universe (well, my universe anyway) that actually likes commercials. He used to get so mad at me for fast-forwarding through all the crap commercials, but I guess by now he’s just gotten used to it. The only commercials I actually enjoy are those that air during the Superbowl. But really, who in their right mind doesn’t like those?

So if you don’t have a TiVo, where the hell have you been living? A time machine stuck in 1988? Also, you should go get one, NOW! Really, I mean it! Go… shoo… now!!

Today marks the 2nd official day of Christmas shopping. Monster J and I went to Burlington to get some stuff for Grease Monkey for Christmas and ended up with almost all of the shopping done for him. Woohoo!

Speaking of shopping…  today marks the 1st official day of me talk for NaBloPoMo.

I am a shopaholic. Through and through. I will shop all day, any day of the week. I truly believe that shopping is therapy (retail therapy – surely you’ve heard of it, no?) . No joke. Just like Starbucks, I associate shopping with any emotion I have, good or bad. That is all for now, more tomorrow.